Desks & Dayjobs

*Sorry about the audio at the start, we had a little mic trouble during our livestream, but it gets better after a couple of minutes!* In this episode of DM in the PM, DM Hobert sits down with cast member (and IRL co-worker) Brandon Kirkman to talk about Matt Meat, his character for our new campaign. Brandon and Hobert chat about Matt’s backstory and work together to create the “mundane version” of Brandon’s tabaxi monk, figuring out how best to translate D&D’s martial arts class into a chatty dad who used to be cool. Afterward, Hobert and Brandon talk about danger and damage in the game, and how the characters will have to battle the ennui of the workday on top of any foes they might encounter. Finally, Matt meets the man behind the Mysterious Voice, and he asks Matt some important questions. Also, check out new episodes of DM in the PM, a chat show for DMs and the TTRPG curious, and our bi-monthly Mandatory Work Outing one shot D&D adventures on the NPC inc. Twitch! https://www.twitch.tv/npcincorporated

In this episode of DM in the PM, DM Hobert sits down with new cast member Sadie Lancrete to talk about Dimetra Kubrick, her character for our upcoming new NPC inc. campaign. Sadie and Hobert chat about Dimetra’s backstory and work together to create the “mundane version” of Sadie’s tiefling warlock. Get ready to get into the nitty-gritty of warlockin,’ as Hobert and Sadie talk pacts and patrons, and design Dimetra’s version of the fiend patron: her demanding, competitive parents. Afterward, Hobert and Sadie talk about the best place for after-work drinks near the NPC inc. facility and meet a group of punks who definitely play harder than they work. Finally, a Mysterious Voice asks Dimetra some important questions. Also, check out new episodes of DM in the PM, a chat show for DMs and the TTRPG curious, and our bi-monthly Mandatory Work Outing one shot D&D adventures on the NPC inc. Twitch! https://www.twitch.tv/npcincorporated

Get ready to Yee, Haw, and break a couple bottles, cuz the staff of the Double Curse is about to brawl in Part 2 of our Rowdy Roadhouse one shot! On one side of the bar, we have Phallax the alchemist, Petunia the monk, Tex the barbarian, and Durzek the rogue, and on the other side the full might of the H.O.G. Gang and a host of opportunistic criminals (and Glorg). Will our heroes be able to bring peace to the bar before other, more powerful parties join in the fray? Or will tonight’s shift be their last? Find out in the thrilling, all combat conclusion! In this episode Petunia really wants to get shot Phallax give Crunch a very nice birthday gift Tex swings away Durzek spends some turns hangin’ out, doin' drugs And The Dude is loose… Join us for the next Mandatory Work Outing on https://www.twitch.tv/npcincorporated and check out our new Discord server where you can get VPI (Very Professional Intern) clearance and check out behind the scenes info on our new season, chat with cast members and other fans, and

In this episode of DM in the PM, DM Hobert sits down with cast member Liz Getty to talk about Quinn Larkin, their character for our upcoming new NPC inc. campaign. Liz and Hobert chat about Quinn’s backstory and work together to create the “mundane version” of Liz’s gnome paladin (who puts the “pal” in paladin). Afterward, Hobert and Liz talk about the work they’ll be doing at the NPC inc. facility, the yet-un-named Fantasy CTA, and meet a sly shipping manager whose laid-back attitude might make them a good ally. Finally, a Mysterious Voice asks Quinn some important questions. Also, check out new episodes of DM in the PM, a chat show for DMs and the TTRPG curious, and our bi-monthly Mandatory Work Outing one shot D&D adventures on the NPC inc. Twitch! https://www.twitch.tv/npcincorporated

The Double Curse is the roughest, rowdiest roadhouse in King City. Known for its nightly brawls, loose rules, and heavy pours; the bar is hub for villains and crooks, and the staff isn’t much better. In this two-fisted, hard-drinking one shot, a rabbitfolk monk running from her heroic pedigree, a human alchemist with a passion for weird science, a human barbarian with a cool ‘tude, and a duergar rogue with sticky fingers and a poor work ethic team up for a night at the infamous wateringhole to see if they can once again make it through a shift in one piece. With so many criminals and magic villains in one room, how long will it be before one of these rough customers starts something? In this episode: Petunia meets an old friend of her mom’s Durzek recalls the women of Duergar bard, Lou Bega Tex doesn’t know wine from a hole in the ground Phallax is thinking about armor made of teeth And everybody wants to be a “dude” Join us for the next Mandatory Work Outing on https://www.twitch.tv/npcincorporated and

In this episode of DM in the PM, DM Hobert sits down with new cast member Meadow Kei Lillium to talk about June Esmond, her character for our upcoming new NPC inc. campaign. Meadow and Hobert chat about June’s backstory, and work together to create the “mundane version” of Meadow’s firbolg cleric. Afterward, Hobert gives Meadow some insight into the world and office setting for the campaign, and a Mysterious Voice asks June some important questions. Also, check out new episodes of DM in the PM, a chat show for DMs and the TTRPG curious, and our bi-monthly Mandatory Work Outing one shot D&D adventures on the NPC inc. Twitch! https://www.twitch.tv/npcincorporated

The Weedian monks continue to proceed in Part 2 of NPC Incorporated’s Mandatory Work Outing one shot based on “Dopesmoker” by Sleep. Our heroes continue to guide the procession toward the holy mountain as more eerie signs of the end of the world add to the din of the desert’s endless drone. Get ready from some real “wizard-van shit,” this adventure culminates in an epic battle up the steps of the temple of the Weedians! In this episode Grandy fights an IRL battle Boots shares his technique for getting ladies Les isn’t very reassuring Trey learns that not all that glitters is gold And Father Night breaks his one rule Join us for the next Mandatory Work Outing on https://www.twitch.tv/npcincorporated and check out our new Discord server where you can get VPI (Very Professional Intern) clearance and check out behind the scenes info on our new season, chat with cast members and other fans, and see lots of pictures of our pets.

Pardon our dust! While NPC inc. prepares for our new campaign, enjoy the audio from one of our latest Mandatory Work Outing D&D one shot adventure! In this non-canon adventure based on the heavy metal classic “Dopesmoker” by Sleep, DM Hobert leads Liz Getty, special guests John Fowler and Sadie Lancrete, and new NPC inc. cast member Meadow Kei Lillium across a stoner-rock infused desert adventure. Join the procession of the weed priest as a laid-back monk, a nebbish wizard, a lovestruck druid, and a gruff barbarian set out for a holy mountain in the middle of the Endless Waste, a vast desert tinged with demonic magic… In this episode Grandy knows her way around a boulder Boots takes a bite out of jackalwere crime Les is the proper amount of whelmed Trey should have been a ninja tortle or vampire And the team makes Jackalopes extinct Join us for the next Mandatory Work Outing on Mon https://www.twitch.tv/npcincorporated and check out our new Discord server where you can get VPI (Very Professional Intern) cle

Please listen to this quick minisode for some important information about the Desks & Dayjobs podcast, and thanks for listening. - The Staff

It’s lunch time and our heroes are scattered to the wind, trying to save Gerbbi and Rory from the clutches of HR. While Tory tries to remember who she is, Agnes and Maxwell set off to find out the extent of Gerbbi’s (alleged) crimes, and Stuart heads off for his side quest at Chimera Software. Will our heroes be able to save those closest to them before they face the scorn of an HR inquisition? Will Tory be able to break free from the allure of simple life of record keeping, or will she fall into a spin off show we’re calling ToryVision? Will Agnes and Maxwell be able to mount a defense for Gerbbi, or did they already intimate all the witnesses and destroy all the evidence, as good guys are want to do? And will Stuart make his meeting? And what office cultures will he discover deeper in the office of Chimera? Find out if they ever get to enjoy their lunches in this exciting episode! In this episode Hobe is on the case! Maxwell really would rather text you Agnes walks away, like a badass Stuart joins in The H

Hello dear listeners! Our heroes are hot on the trail of the mysterious corporate spy and they have a solid, well thought out plan to capture him while he eats his lunch. Surely our heroes won’t get distracted as they split to cut off the spy’s escape from the stairwell! That’s not the kind of people they are! Just kidding, they pretty much do that immediately in this thrilling episode filled with stairwell sneaking, Records room raiding, and prisoner taking! Will Agnes and Maxwell be able to stomach each other’s company, or will the smells of lunches on the other companies’ floors lure them off-track? Will Tory and Stuart’s attempt to lead on Mama Storybrook lead them to the K files, or will it lead one of them into a trap? And what’s up with Gerbbi’s solo mission? Find out in this exciting episode of “Files & Folders”! In this episode Maxwell smells the stairs Stuart stares back shields Tory is weak to heart-to-hearts Agnes experiences the opposite of sex And DM Hobert makes a game ruining accidental cum j

Welcome to 2021 and welcome back to Thursday, dear listener! Our heroes are still on the hunt, looking for the mysterious corporate spy they hope will derail Mr. Holder’s plan to terminate one of their co-workers. As Special Projects makes their way to the Sales floor to hunt for their strangely forgettable prey, Tory marches down to HR to demand the release of her brother from their punishing anger management training. As Tory nat-1s herself into the clutches of Mr. Kammen, will she be able to make a deal with the self-described Pharaoh of Forms to free her twin? Can the Special Projects group find anyone who’s seen the strange spy, or is the whole point of invisibility that you can’t see the invisible person? Find out in this exciting episode! In this episode Gerbbi is a talker, technically Stuart shows off his one page crush book Maxwell visits his old pal “Jeeeaaahhhnnn?” Agnes finds new knuckles to crack Tory makes a Freudian Ferris slip And everyone wants to take Dennis to the Sales Floor Dance

Ho ho ho! Seasons Greetings, dear listeners! It’s time for our Holiday episode! If you thought a RPG podcast that pretends to be in an office had become a fanatical concept in 2020, wait till you hear us pretend to be at an in-person company holiday party! In this year’s exciting secret Santa, our heroes once again gather in the third floor bedroom to enjoy some cookies, beverages, and camaraderie before turning against each other in the gift exchange. Get ready for a cookie-munching, mulled-wine-pounding, no-holds-barred festive free-for-all! In this holiday episode Hobe makes one of his vegan mistakes Stuart rolls against himself Tory debuts a new “wine-drunk Mrs. Claus” look Gerbbi tries to get us a vodka sponsorship Agnes resists some cookie damage And Maxwell is nervous about his new accessory

Greetings, dear listeners! Desks & Dayjobs is back! Our heroes awake from their busy Wednesdays tired, hung-over, and ready to spring into action to stop the sinister machinations of Mr. Holder. Get ready for a day filled with mystery, intrigue, and coffee, dear listeners! Prepare to see the effect of hat promises made, and see if they’re hat promises kept!! Steel yourself against the threat of missing co-workers, office miscommunication, and an eerie new employee!!! All these mundane terrors and more await our heroes as they begin…THURSDAY. Welcome back to Desks & Dayjobs: come for the opening bits, stay for the famous cameras in the basement. In this episode Agnes picks a good t-shirt Gerbbi had too many poppers Maxwell makes the jump from Uncle to Grandpa Tory/Gwen achieves total immersion And all Stuart wants to do is tell you about his date!

The moon is rising and the machinations of Dr. Gregsteen, Sgt. Harrison, and the mysterious Mr. Kammen are coming to fruition! With our investigators taking on their tasks to help the sinister sergeant with his scheme, they take some time to secretly plot a way out of this kooky, spooky science experiment. Ramona minces her meat but not her words with the menacing marksman, Mr. Kammen! Dr. Gestalt learns the tricks of his trade and tries not to trip up his backstory or accent! Arnie meets Pamela Godfrey, reporter for the Chicago Moon-Times, and tries to make sure she knows his muscly arms are the ones she should run to when trouble starts! And Stephen really, really, really wants a gun. Will our rag-tag group of strangers pull together to stop a beast from being summoned to Bray Road, or will they all end up as meat cubes in its fiery jaws? Find out in the thrilling conclusion to our Halloween Call of Cthulhu one-shot! In this episode Dr. Gestalt is real America funny boy Stephen dreams of a good hamburger h

Muahaha! Turn down the lights and crank up the volume, it’s time for another Desks & Dayjobs Halloween Special! Our fantasy-office heroes are putting away their D20s and taking out their D100s as we dive back into the grim mysteries and scary settings of Call of Cthulhu! In this year’s trip to “Spooky Chicago, 1936,” our “heroes” are all down and out characters who turned to a mysterious “nun” named Mother Storybrook for help. When the favor they promised her comes due, they’re all sent - with secret missions and identities - to a hunting lodge in “Spooky Wisconsin” where the unthinkable is about to transpire. The heir to the Harrison Cheese fortune, Sgt. Einrich Harrison, has gathered a hunter, a scientist, and his assorted (and strange) staff to complete a strange and terrible experiment in supernatural science. Join us as a butcher, a baseball player, a bank robber, and a “psychologist” take a trip North and experience the terror of…THE INCIDENT ON BRAY ROAD! *Pipe organ car horn sound* In this episode Dr

Drinks have been drunk, apps have been eaten, and our heroes are ready for their respective date/boys’ night main events! At Drugan’s Pub, Maxwell and Tory split up with their coworkers to throw some darts, figure out what Tony’s deal is, and hopefully not irk the Keeper of Darts, Big Bruce. At Mangofly’s, Agnes and Gerbbi dive deeper into the mystery that is Loro McMorgan and her hard to understand (and hear) motivations. And at Puzzlebox Cinemas, Stuart and Amy’s date continues as they struggle through the boring and riff-able moments of Batgoblin Triumphant. Get ready for the exciting conclusion to our heroes after works plans, the full Brux Wings backstory, and an introduction that will set a new tone for our heroes’ Thursdays. In this episode Maxwell went to dart college Stuart gets wrist deep (in some ice-cream) Gerbbi is more of an Olive Domain guy Agnes learns the history of the hat Tory uses “are you ok?” but it’s not very effective! And our heroes are invited for a nightcap with a familiar foe

Date/Boys’ Night continues and our heroes are seeing new, somewhat ominous sides of their coworkers! Join us in this double-stuffed installment of our adventures for a continuing saga of stolen ride shares, cryptic movie tickets, cocktail sword fights, and so many alcohol-related constitution saving throws. Will our adventurers achieve the ultimate goal of this quest: to just have fun and enjoy themselves? Or will terrible corporate music, demons among them, and deadly door puzzles turn their merriment miserable? Tune in for this exciting episode, featuring a whirlwind tour of European erotic comedy classics and a lot of confusing sexual tension! In this episode Hobe feels what it means to be a puppet Agnes wants to play a game Gerbbi feels Cheerful Maxwell whispers in a lot of ears Tory spreads some more Maxwell/DM Hobert rumors Stuart takes in some erotic cinema And we roll a surprising amount of Fun Batural Twenties

The Wednesday is winding down, dear listeners, and our heroes have finally reached their long awaited (made three days ago) after work plans. With just a little juice still in the workday, our heroes find themselves confronting each other for ditching duties, flirting with co-workers, and calling in favors with dangerous people - ya know, normal work stuff - before heading off for a night of food, drink, camaraderie, and perhaps romance. Will Maxwell and Tori be able to stomach the first stop of the Boys Night revelry? Are Agnes and Gerbbi walking into a chain restaurant trap at Mangofly’s? And can Stuart overcome his nervousness and enjoy his first IRL date with Amy? Take a shot of a hot sauce and tune in to find out! In this episode Gerbbi ruins his sneak streak Tory hopes to be a “Gloom Doom” Agnes wants the wingless bones Stuart experiences a hatless date Hobe feels the thrill of HR again Maxwell tries for Miss Congeniality And there’s some light Stuart and Hobe slash fiction

Our heroes are barely holding on to their Wednesday work ethic, dear listeners. The excitement and terror of the lunch hour has thrown the afternoon into disarray! While Agnes and Tory take a quick (or so they think) trip to the Merrowwind Mall for some new outfits and some extra-greasy ‘Za, Stuart tries to rally the wounded (pride-wise) Maxwell and a particularly grumpy Gerbbi to run a secret training session for the Gray Guard. Can our heroes still accomplish their Special Projects tasks with a split party? Will Agnes and Tory find something fun and fashionable at the decaying mall, or will they be too creeped out by the languid mall workers and bail? Will Luke Goodboy be able to help Maxwell find the missing Management manual, or will Maxwell regret getting the incompetent assistant involved? In this episode Maxwell is just like those two scenes from Mean Girls Tory has greasy little fingers Gerbbi continues his sneak-streak Stuart strains to make his own reality Agnes says Argus’ catchphrase And DM Hober