Small Beans

A brand new Small Beans podcast evolves before your very eyes in this initial episode of What Dinosaur Something Something! Co-hosts and dino-pals Abe Epperson, Bridgett Greenberg and Michael Swaim debate the virtues of the prehistoric turtle the size of a VW bug that was the Glyptodon. Art by Small Beans members. Wicked guitar riff by Abe Epperson.

In an epic crossover and out-of-order episode of CBB, Abe and Michael are joined by David Bell and Tom Reimann, their analogues over at the Gamefully Unemployed network! All four convene to strike Buster Scruggs wile the figurative iron is hot. Does it work? It appears to do, yes!

Abe and Cristian fend off Oumuamua, those little guys from Mars Attacks, and Galactus all at once by delving into our species' (extensive) hypothetical experience and (limited) actual experience with alien invasions.

Michael ropes Katie Willert and Abe Epperson into discussing his favorite scripted comedy -- 1993 Alex Winter/Randy Quaid vehicle Freaked -- for fifty minutes, thereby destroying any credibility he once had as a film analyst.

On this episode of My Top 8: a relationship podcast about friendship, Maggie sits down with May Leitz (AKA Nyx Fears) as they discuss how films shaped our idea of friendship and why Jack and Sally may have sent some wrong messages.

Abe and Cristian attempt to save all science fiction and the sanity of costume designers everywhere with an argument for why aliens may, in fact, be roughly human-shaped. Find out why that's even not the weird part; the weird part is how WE'RE shaped. We're freaky! Boobs shouldn't exist! Hate your body for whole new reasons along with us. Art by Michael Vincent Bramley. Music by Abe Epperson.

Comedian, book-carrier, fuck-not-haver and College Humor mainstay Katie Marovitch joins hosts Bridgett and Sarah to discuss a truly diverse set of topics. These include why hugging your grandma is harder than kissing your dog on the mouth, writing garbage bullshit horoscopes to trick dopes, and childhood sociopathy!

This aggression will not stand, man.

Happy Halloween! In honor of all those burned at the stake due to mass hysteria surrounding witchcraft, here's Soren Bowie forcing Mike and Abe to cover possibly the worst movie ever featured on the show. Dracula, Frankenstein's Monster, The Creature From The Black Lagoon, and The Wolfman team up to kill lots of cops, fail to kill several children, and hang out on the Universal back-lot. Laugh along with us, your mouth presumably stuffed with candy corn!

It's the age-old struggle between coal and rocketry! We cover one of Abe's favorite movies with the help of Gamefully Unemployed's Tom Reimann, and admire some old-fashioned rocket boys.

Biba Pickles discusses art, battling bi-polar disorder, and covering her body with cereal and self-inflicted cigarette burns. It's a party! Art by Seth Laster. Music by Abe Epperson, Kelsey Hudgins and Kevin Clark.

From Blade Runner's vision of Los Angeles to just plain old current-day Los Angeles, the PCPD boys delve into Megacities both fictitious and all-too-real. Judge them with Dredd and you Coruscan't go wrong!

The Bechdel Cast host Jamie Loftus returns to ride the roller coaster of hacking, sexual assault, efficient Swedish filmmaking and Daniel Craig that is TGWTDT. Abe and Michael are also there to kick a hornet's nest and play with fire, respectively.

The beloved Abe Epperson sits down with Maggie to talk about his experience as a "drifter" in middle school and high school, and how he eventually decided to start cultivating lifelong friends. He also has a very strong opinion about the word "LOVE" in friendships, VERY strong.

The Coens--and therefore this podcast--start to hit a serious stride with the sixth installment, Fargo. Now entering one of the Coens' Golden Ages! So it is with one eye on the horizon and the other on the giant Paul Bunyan statue ominously looming overhead that we plow right into a snowbank of greed, impotence, mindless violence and what will surely stand as the best wood-chipper scene in movie history.

Menendez Brothers trial juror Hazel Thornton, author of Hung Jury, stops by to discuss her time engaged with one of the most high-profile cases of the century. Topics include gender bias, political bias, and flow charts.

After narrowly surviving an encounter with a wild cloud of marijuana vapor, comedian, journalist, author and host of Behind The Bastards Robert Evans joins Abe and Michael to punch Nazis. Or at least analyze a great film about some serious Nazi-punching punks. Reach right through this door here and give the episode a listen! Seriously, nothing bad will happen to your arm. We don't know why you'd even insinuate that.

Comedian, writer, director and Cracked alum Carmen Angelica finally joins the Small Beans pantheon by bravely exposing some of the truly unfortunate fashion/life choices that have haunted her lo these past twenty years. Co-hosts Bridgett and Sarah commiserate, as is their wont.

Comedian and writer Hana joins Maggie to talk about getting by with a little help from friends, what happens when we forget we have friends (you're probably not as alone as you feel!), and defends her favorite friend duo.

Bridgett Greenberg, co-host of Rough Stuff, takes a dose of her own medicine in The Pit and gets personal about her relationship to anxiety, panic attacks, and spinning tubes.