Small Beans

Cristian and Abraham, two people with ultra-modern sci-fi names, examine spacesuits and the spacefarers who fill them. As this symbiosis between science-fiction and science fact attests, surviving in the vacuum of what is 99% of the Universe takes some doing.

Teresa Lee has a love inside of her that makes her invincible and a light you can't even imagine, so we think you'd better say "that's that" and listen to our podcast before she comes over there and beats the Hell from you.

James Gandolfini, Frances McDormand, Tony Shalhoub, Billy Bob Thornton, and common house-dirt all collide in a way Heisenberg himself couldn't have predicted, but the Coens apparently can. Join Michael and Abe as they struggle to crack the code of this often-obtuse, but always interesting entry in the Coen canon.

Vanessa Gritton comes by for her first non-Red Dead-related episode of Small Beans, and gets things off to a great start by kicking Sarah and Bridgett in the she-testicles whenever they disagree even slightly.

Maggie sits down with writer and actor Zora Bikangaga to discuss the social complexities of interracial friendships and tips on how to be happy for other's success.

Cristian and his stalwart co-pilot Abe swerve back into sci-fi hilarity with an overview of awesome guns, both lethal and non-, from our favorite futurescapes. The Sick Stick pranks alone are worth the price of admission.

Hey, you remember that one Simpsons episode where Ruth Powers and Marge flee from Homer and Chief Wiggum across the desert? Wiggum tries to cook engine-block eggs? Well, hey, let's talk about the incredible Ridley Scott movie of which that was a parody! Maggie Mae joins to help us dive into a pretty kickass flick.

Sage of Boning and Bodily Juices (also licensed Sex Therapist) Jamila Dawson returns to help explain what exactly she does, why kink and poly relationships are on the rise, and what to do when it all explodes in your face (and not in the good way). At the top, Michael ruins your mental image of him forever, and all future prospects of holding elected office.

Bridgett Greenberg, your Sound Leader, and her grubby minions Michael and Abe, FINALLY -- fucking FINALLY -- determine, once and for all, What Dinosaur Real Good. It's Ankylosaur, the one with a tail made of murder!

In a wiiiiiiiide-ranging episode, Creature Feature host Katie Goldin joins Bridgett and Sarah to discuss eating snails, butt worms, her Bird Rights Activism, and some seriously useful dating advice. But to get to the advice, there's def some slime to wade through, so start wadin'!

Colloquially referred to as "O Brother," this film is a panoply of tight spots, m'hair, and suitors what got prospects. Abe and Michael delve them all, and thankfully do not break into song at almost any point. Turturro. Clooney. Nelson. And thou.

Your intrepid hosts Abe and Cristian briefly mention The Day After Tomorrow, then essentially just have a sobering talk about Climate Change. So BUCKLE IN and SAVE A BEE, because our lives depend on it.

Maggie sits down to talk with stand-up comedian and friend Jason Webb about getting yelled at by a teacher for trying to hold his friend's hand in school and how he eventually learned to love his friends.

The Daily Zeitgang has us surrounded! They've demanded the release of Miles Gray, their second-rate co-chair, but we refuse to comply until he's bared his soul with us regarding a couple flicks. First up, perennial Christmas Coens/Zwigoff train wreck Bad Santa.

Small Beans favorite Katie Willert stops in to discuss the long, hard road of trying to break into Hollywood, the many odd jobs she's taken in the interim, and how to appreciate what life gives you, even when it's not what you expected. Michael opens with a short story that lasts about forty-five minutes, in case you Skippers were wondering. Music by Kevin Clark and Abe Epperson. Art by Seth Laster.

BOLD is a podcast about race and justice in America, and a collaboration between Small Beans and Showing Up For Racial Justice, produced by White People 4 Black Lives. In the first episode, BLM Los Angeles co-founder Dr. Melina Abdullah discusses America's history of police brutality, current efforts to dismantle that system, and how you can get involved. Also features a piece by Alyesha Wise and voices and sounds from the ongoing effort to remove Los Angeles District Attorney Jackie Lacey from office. Music by Rachael Cantu and Melantopia. Art by Michael Vincent Bramley.

Katie Willert discusses stalking celebrities and appropriating black culture on-stage! Sarah Griffith discusses more times she vomited, because of course she does.

The second episode of WDRG? FINALLY gets to the bottom of what dinosaur real good. Turns out it's BIG, too! Co-hosts and dino-pals Abe Epperson, Bridgett Greenberg and Michael Swaim debate the virtues of the Dreadnoughtus, the big one you don't wanna fu' wi'. Art by Small Beans members. Wicked guitar riff by Abe Epperson.

Writer/comedian Talia Jane recounts her travails dealing with John Cheese (real name Mack Leighty), whom she helped to out as a serial sexual harasser and general creep this year, in spite of a startling lack of support from the systems we expect to support us through that type of thing. Wonder where all of Cheese's Cracked by-lines went? After hearing about Talia's shitty experiences and kickass responses in the face of those experiences, you won't anymore. Art by Seth Laster. Music by Abe Epperson and Kevin Clark.

DRUMS! But also the nature of art, genius, nature versus nurture, and sound editing perfection. But mostly DRUMS! Cristian helps Michael and Abe bring fresh eyes to Damien Chazelle's non-La La Land movie. SPOILER: WE WILL NEVER COVER LA LA LAND.