On The Left Side

It's time for us to look back at some of the stupid, silly and downright comical things in our annual look back over the year. In this bonus-length episode we cram in as much of the last 12 months as we can and see that the year was really all about shinpads, airplanes, dogs, bushes, pasties, affairs, goats, dogs again, Take That, Russian politics, and Genetics. But we do also manage to talk about the likes of Swansea, Liverpool, Barcelona, Real Madrid, Arsenal, Everton, Man Utd, Man City, Aberdeen, Free State Stars, Arsenal de Sarandi, Sutton United, Wayne Rooney, Arsene Wenger, Neymar Jr, Lionel Messi, Pep Guardiola, Alexi Sanchez, Jose Mourinho, Bob Bradley, Jurgen Klopp, Gabriel Jesus, Jan Vertongen, Gordon Strachan, Ray Hudson, Wayne Shaw, and sadly, Piers Morgan. Twice. On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. Original music courtesy of Katalina Kicks.    

It's cold, it's snowing, so warm yourself by the fire while we open some of the cards and presents sent to us by the great and good of football, presumably to thank us for all we've done this year. There may even be a sing-song. On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio

David Moyes steps up to protect his West Ham players with some diving tips. Meanwhile, Match of the Day goes all Arty farty thanks to Martin Keown and his brushes, plus we speak to Phillip Hegarty of the Yorkshire International Football Association about the birth of a new power in World Football. On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. 

West Ham’s own version of the chuckle brothers, Dildos, sorry I mean Davids, Gold, and Sullivan have been at it again, and it could mean that Jose Fonte and Robert Snodgrass will be transferred out and replaced with Ben 10 and Bob the Builder. Plus the Iron's club shop is selling possibly the shittiest Christmas present ever. Quite literally. Elsewhere Sam Allardyce has cancelled Christmas for Everton. Possibly because he is the second coming of the Messiah. And though Wayne Rooney is on a hot streak, the clubs social media team don’t seem to know who he is. All that plus the proudest man in Burnley, and could some big name Amerian rappers be heading for the Premier League? On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio.    

  There are still cuts and bruises from the Manchester derby, but most of these seem to have happened in the City changing room, AFTER the game. Plus we search the media to find the truth about, well about Jose Mourinho's dry cleaning bill. The fans are angry, but we wonder what the older generation would have made of it all, and also ask just how young this squad Pep Guardiola has assembled is. And Romelu Lukaku is back on target again. Sort of. On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. The theme tune is written and performed by Katalina Kicks and appears with their kind permission.        

Ronaldo surprised no one by winning footballer of the year for the fifth time. Meanwhile Jurgen Klopp showed off his new teeth before sinking them into everyone who thought that was a penalty in the Merseryside Derby. Down the M62 Noel Gallagher was giving Michael Owen a run for his money in pundit of the year for the Manchester Derby. Elsewhere, Wenger has a headache and seemingly unhappy with his side income from potato crisps, Gary Lineker auditions for a part in BBC remake.   On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. The theme tune "National Hero" is written and performed by Katalina Kicks and appears with their kind permission.

As we get ready for the world's earliest title decider, we ask the big questions: Like does Pep Guardiola write all his Tripadvisor reviews in Capital letters? Is Paul Pogba in the Mafia? And what would happen if Jose did that? We also send some wet wipes to the stadium of light where things are just crap, particularly for one black cat fan.   On The Left Side is Written and Produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. The theme tune "National Hero" is written and performed by Katalina Kicks and appears with their kind permission.    

What did Southgate do to sort out that draw for next summer, could he be any less excited about it, or indeed aware of potential hazards while talking to the press?  And just when you thought Lineker had forgiven Maradonna, the two legends met again in the draw for Russia for 2018. Elsewhere Allardyce is off to a flyer at his new club, no doubt down to the extra money they've waved in his face and some other interesting promises. But just how far can he go? Who better to ask than some ex footballers without a clue. And we wonder if Alan Pardew going to West Brom just the latest challenge on The Apprentice TV show? On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio.  The theme tune "National Hero" is written and performed by Katalina Kicks for Abrupt Audio.  

  Have Everton just had their most important game EVER? Martin Keown thinks so. Big Sam has turned up to save everyone but it looks like he’s not got much to be worried about, so host Jim offers some tips if he goes out clubbing to celebrate. Lukaku is back on target but unfortunately for one Brighton defender it’s not on goal, and though Jose Mourinho seems to get his way again, surely even he can't get away with smoking at a game, even if it is a cigar.   On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. The theme tune is written and performed by Katalina Kicks and appears with their kind permission.

Ant steps into Jims boots today and looks at the Oumar Niasse situation from many different points of view. All of which seem to come from Phil Neville. And would the manager of Algeria be the miracle the Toffees need? Plus there's a sniff of treason in the air as King Cantona makes eyes at Guardiola, and David Moyes proves he's nothing if not unprepared.   On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. With music from Katalina Kicks, appearing with their kind permission.

The Baggies pull the plug on Tony Pulis, only to realise that he may be just the man they need to keep them up. But could he be about to become a United man? That's a handyman, to take care of all the Manchester Utd first teams, first world problems. But it all sounds just a little bit seedy. On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. The theme tune "National Hero" is written and performed by Katalina Kicks and appears with their kind permission.

Goals galore this weekend, Tony Pulis should be scared about his job, but despite the everyone acting like it's already happened, he is acting like he's not bothered.  Zlatan Ibrahimovic and Paul Pogba are back for Man United, but was a secret safari at Carrington the reason for the Zlats speedy recovery. Plus Jim bemoans the fact that the future is not what he was promised, and a football remake of James Cameron's Terminator is on the cards. And there's a real-life Specsavers advert from a game in the Bundesliga.

A goalless draw against Brazil was great for Neymar, but he's been crying, as was Buffon after the Italian's drew a blank against Sweden and now they'll be joining the Republic on the couch at home to watch the World Cup in Russia. But have we found a manager that could inspire Scotland to victory, just like William Wallace did in Braveheart?Plus there are puns galore thanks to the unique way in which the BBC are funded. On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. This episode features extra voices from Tony Laming and music from Katalina Kicks. Find us on Twitter @ontheleftside  

David Moyes is taking no prisoners with his first press engagements as the new boss of West Ham. Which is probably a good thing, as he's sounding more than a little bit scary. Meanwhile, Gareth Southgate cobbled a team together at the last minute after almost everybody he picked to play for England against Germany got their mum to phone in sick.  Also feeling sick at the moment is Slaven Bilic, and we have an exclusive recording of the calls he's been making to all his old players. On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. Original Theme music "National Hero" was written and is performed by Katalina Kicks, and appears with their kind permission.

David Moyes is in, Slaven Bilic is out, and Arsene Wenger is angry. Most managers retire by the time they reach their early seventies, but in this episode, we meet a man who kept going and went on to break all records. Seb Keenan speaks to Jim about winning the Champions League no less than seven times in a row, in the future. On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio.  

There's some good news for everyone who isn't a Sunderland fan, and even good news for sacked manager Simon Grayson. Mick Mcarthy makes us laugh but Roy Keane will probably never be happy. Same goes for Jim if you trample his flowers. He might get angry enough to get on a London Fan TV Channel... On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. Incidental music and SFX courtesy of freesfx.co.uk.  Theme tune "National Hero" is written and performed by Katalina Kicks and appears with their kind permission.

Goodison Park is swimming in job applications from pretty much everyone, including the caretaker manager. It's fair to say that Joey Barton is not a big fan of David Unsworth, no matter how much he tries to hide it. And have we found the worst place to get stitches ever? You may want to sit down as we bring you some shocking injury news from Spain. But don't worry, Jose is here to help you relax. On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio.  Music and SFX courtesy of Katalina Kicks and    

  It’s all balls according to Pep Guardiola, who is in need of a miracle, but not as much as Slaven Bilic who has his head on the West Ham chopping block despite beating Spurs in the cup. And it’s all because he’s too nice. And the Carabao Cup suffers a ‘minor’ technical glitch - but who was really behind it all? On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. The theme tune National Hero is written and performed by Katalina Kicks. All other music and SFX courtesy of freesfx.co.uk. Plus a little snip of something that might get us sued. Again.

This week we stumble over the freshly slain Ronald Koeman in the killing fields of football, learn how to deal with crap Christmas presents from your relatives, and with one rag plumbing new depths, we ask if journalists know the difference between privacy and secrecy. You can probably work that one out.  It's all in the latest ARIA nominated silly sports show that is #OTLS On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim Salveson for Abrupt Audio. Music and incidental SFX are provided by Katalina Kicks, and freesfx.co.uk

This week we bring you back to 1912 but it seems the FA may have been there all along. Elsewhere, Jose complains about the fact that no one complains about his complaints. At least I think that's what he was saying. And which superstar footballer may have to thank Deliveroo for his form? Just one question we will fail to answer.On The Left Side is written and produced by Ant McGinley and Jim SalvesonFollow us on Twitter @OnTheLeftSide and on Instagram @OnTheLeftSidePod