Tbtl- Too Beautiful To Live

Andrew is upset that his submission to the New Yorker cartoon caption contest didn’t win after seeing the finalists. Speaking of the New Yorker, Luke is fascinated by a piece about the VW minibus, which was apparently somewhat inspired by something called “The Chicken Wars.”  Photo of VW minibus by OrangeChallenger, licensed under Creative Commons.

Luke does something really, really terrible during the show involving [trigger warning] coffee and mayonnaise. Plus, Dr. Oz’s social media team continues to get completely roasted by his opponent’s campaign. And Andrew tries to tackle the age-old question: What’s worse, listening to someone talk about their dreams or listening to someone talk about their fantasy baseball team? 

Luke has introduced spray bottles into his relationship with his cat, and it’s changed everything. Plus, a woman earned a job interview after responding to a rejection letter with a goofy meme.

Andrew is working to change the way he talks to his cat -- and all pets in general. Plus, a minor league baseball GM gets a prostate exam while singing “Take Me Out To The Ballgame”, although it’s not entirely clear why. And Luke and Andrew try to figure out why they are completely uninterested in the Game of Thrones sequel.

Luke has thoughts on the new, buzzy Nathan Fielder show, The Rehearsal. He and Andrew also come up with a new segment idea for TBTL.

Luke just got back from Austin, where he gathered with friends to pay tribute to the late, great Drew McFrizz. Meanwhile, Andrew was almost denied an opportunity to clean a big mess in peace. Plus, something very interesting happened at an Omaha airport over the weekend. 

The CEO of Costco has made it clear that the store will NOT be raising prices on its cheap hot dogs, even if it is a money-losing venture. This gives Andrew the opportunity to ask Luke a very important question about the way he consumes soda pop. 

Andrew learns something shocking about his own past. And an article in the New York Times helps Luke understand how he became a pathological liar (JUST KIDDING).

Luke runs into some problems in his quest to reprint an Andre The Giant photo, and it’s making Andrew feeling a little panicky. They also talk about the time Ray Kroc commandeered a stadium PA system to call his own ballplayers “stupid.” And Andrew accidentally entered a humor contest while on the toilet.

Luke returns to the bar that has his favorite, mysterious Andre The Giant photo hanging on the wall, and he asks the owner if he can borrow it. Plus, a stolen Olympic medal is discovered in an old McDonald’s bag. And Andrew is excited that TBTL finally has a P.O. Box!

Luke has finally found true happiness, and he has video to prove it. Plus, a listener sheds some important light on Luke’s recent adventures at The Home Depot. And a drunk newscaster gives it her all in Albany.

Luke joins the show from Port Townsend, where he’s falling in love with the small maritime village all over again. Meanwhile, Andrew (and his camera) got teased on the bus recently. And two Oregon cities are battling over a claim to “the world’s smallest park.”

Andrew does some old-fashioned, shoe-leather reporting at his local Subway shop to find out what’s really going on with the restaurant’s menu changes. He and Luke also offer a somewhat delayed review of No Country For Old Men. And they discuss the rise of “GentleMinions”, who are disrupting screenings of the new Minions movie. 

Andrew is very agitated about upcoming changes to the sandwich menu at Subway. Luke had a real scare with his cat, Bubbles, this morning. And a listener needs help navigating a small-ish issue with his neighbor.

Luke and Andrew began their 4th of July Weekend hoping to get a lawnmower and a dog, respectively. Today they report back on their adventures. 

Luke’s attempts to get his hands on a lawnmower continue throughout the show, as he receives many updates and mixed messages from hardware stores around the Pacific Northwest. Plus, the internet is desperately trying to find the woman who won almost all the cooking prizes at a Virginia-Kentucky district  fair.

Andrew’s dog-ological clock is ticking again, Luke runs into issues buying a new lawnmower, and the Marsupial Gurgle website is entering a new phase of life.

Bubbles the Cat got up to a lot of trouble in Luke’s studio yesterday, almost completely sabotaging today’s show. Plus, employees at Medieval Times want to unionize, Bed, Bath and Beyond stores may be cutting air conditioning to save money, and AirBNB says “no more parties!”

Andrew went to the dump yesterday, where he hoped to avoid getting “hollered at.” Results were mixed. Plus, Luke is in email hell. And a drunk man in Japan lost a thumb drive containing personal and banking information of a half a million people. Photo of Shoreline Transfer Station art by Martin Auad via Creative Commons license. The photo in the transfer station is called Terra Firma by photographer Steve McGehee.

Andrew’s War On Blackberries leads to an encounter with a new neighbor. Luke almost struck a deal with the world’s sketchiest electrician. And a listener shares an incredibly cringy story from the workplace.