Empathic Writing Journey

A few years ago I wrote and published an essay titled "The POWER of Your Intense Fragility: What Culture Hasn't Told You About Being Sensitive AND Strong" (available on Amazon.)A kind reviewer described it as "less self-help for your inadequacies and more of a call to action for your special gifts."And another said it "illuminates the power of your nature in such a way that you can begin to envision yourself as having a significant role in creating a kinder and more sustainable world." I'm grateful to those readers for getting my message, and I'd like to share a little of it with you here. This is section 11:                  ______________________________________________________________We are facing more crises now than have been faced in the last 5,000 years of recorded history. We have to think differently and act quickly. We have to return to good sense and sanity, rather than normalizing the absurd. Indifference is possibly the most harmful threat we face

When you think about it, life is just a series of meetings.Some make your heart race with giddy anticipation, like auditions, interviews, new client pitches, dates... You want these to go well.Others make your neck and shoulders tighten, because you dread the people, the purpose, or both. But since your presence is somehow required, you want those to go well, too. For either type, here's a fun and easy experiment to try:​ BEFORE the meeting, see/imagine the person/people you are meeting with. Now, see/imagine them happy and fulfilled. Wish it for them like you would wish it for yourself, your lover, your child. This is the entire practice. Doing it will cleanse and enlarge your heart. Uncover aversion. Remove resistance. It will make you a better artist, businessperson, and human in general. It will also make you feel fantastic. Because it reinforces the wonderful idea that you've got so much GOODNESS to spare, you just splish-splash it all around you... wildly and without measure! You id

The definition of terror is "extreme fear."The opposite of which is "extreme love."Fear clenches. Restricts. Chokes. Like a hyperventilating man who needs oxygen, but will not get it with short, shallow breaths.Despite his body's urge to go completely ballistic and flail in panic, exerting energy and burning the last bits of oxygen in his system, he must instead: Calm himself. Slow his breath. Deepen his inhale. And we must do the same.We can choose to opt-of of bandwagons racing toward Fearville. Just don't jump on. Let 'em ride past you. Hysteria is movement, but not necessarily wise movement. So remain calm and centered, knowing that your grounded state-of-mind is the greatest contribution you can make in a time of heightened pain and unrest.Greet the knee-jerk rage that wants to kick and punch and react.Say "Hello" to the rage, and then tell it to stand down.A clear head + clear heart is needed. A mass shooting of love is needed.How does that happen? What does that look like? It looks lik

(With special thanks to Bill + Becky Wilson, my teachers from Midwest Permaculture.) DISCLAIMER: I write personal things. Long, personal things.That violates the blanching rules of "good journalism," click-baity web contentand anemic attention spans. So why risk over-sharing, and the appearance of self-obsession?Because I have struggled to find/know/create a right-feeling place for myself in the world.And I know it is a huge irony that A MASS AMOUNT of people feel that exact same isolated way!Being earnest out loud helps dissolve felt alienation,and ​dignifies the important role of our feelings and our hopes. A year ago, I returned to my high-traffic apartment in Chicago after attendinga two-week permaculture + earth-architecture training in the Mojave desert.I floundered, and felt quite lost at first.I was unsure about what to do for employment.I could not return to my old, matrix-y life from which I had unplugged.But I also had little-to-no developed skills in the earth-oriented dir

ROTTING ROSES. It's easy to forget that apples (along with many other fruits) are in the rose family. I have a weird segmentation in my mind: roses are formal and romantic... apples are casual and snackish.Also, apples come up a lot in religion. And technology.Anyway, outside a train station, where all events are precisely scheduled to the minute, there stands this apple tree. This unregulated food source is not near any foot-paths, so its banquet is for the wild ones.In my few watching moments, I saw a squirrel, and circling bees dive in.​They dove in to what had been provided for them. If you have forgotten how to let go and loosen up, watch a wild animal or insect eat. Let them remind you how to enjoy wholesome, primal pleasures and delights.​ GROUNDING STEW. When you start seeing splashes of gold and orange...in pumpkins... candy corn... deciduous trees...that is a good time to have a nice, grounding stew.Get your root veggies. Carrots. Beets. White and Sweet Potatoes. Onions. Parsnips. These st

It's no secret, that I am socially awkward. The commercial focus of dominant culture just doesn’t appeal to me. At all. And even more than that, it actually erodes my well-being.So I made some drastic changes -- to accommodate my monkish ways -- and I work from home as an independent writer and lavish listener. (If you are under-listened to -- and who isn't?? -- you should check out my offering.)A client recently asked me to write about the irresponsibility of Western filmmakers and media who popularize a harmful idealized myth of Gandhi. I DECIDED TO WRITE ABOUT THE ROOT. NOT A PETAL. Fifteen years ago I sat in a graduate World Religion class and, on the day we were introduced to Hinduism, I was horrified. Nothing could have prepared me for the explanation of caste. My heart broke for the VOICELESS at the very BOTTOM of this diabolical structure: FREE WILL? PERSONAL RIGHTS? NO, NOT FOR EVERYONE. How would you like to have your destiny scheduled for you? Instead of a birth cert

Hey, Lovelies! It's been awhile, huh? How are you? Great in every way, I hope. I have been doing a whole lot of integration. Phew!Better demonstrated, than passively discussed ad nauseum. Demonstration is where I'm headed. As a result of me living in strong collaboration with my heart and soul, my creative projects got rearranged. So some planned things -- like the relaunch of "It's Beautiful Inside: An Introvert's Right to BE" -- got delayed. (My goodness... talk about a Pandora's Box! That essay is completely overhauled. If you got an original copy, please contact me so I can send you the update... which is progressing beautifully.)  And some unplanned things -- like this Primer for Courageous Creativity -- got created.Suppression breeds sickness, unhappiness and fragmentation. Expression, on the other hand, is a way to let our life breathe.So many of us are holding our breath. Uncomfortably. Blue in the face. So programmed and processed, we forgot

Did you know a certain kind of conversation can help accelerate your dreams and growth-cycles? They can. Certain kinds.We are wired with a longing to be witnessed. Children say, "Mom, look at me!" We post on social media and say, "Friends/colleagues, look at me!" And there is an actual correlation between virtual "Likes," and released feel-good neurohormones, like oxytocin. Social media and neuroscience has provided a lot of data about this human craving we have to be seen and affirmed. But our innermost part requires something more than screen-deep. Some souls do, anyway. Are you one? If so, with a trusted listener, try the following three steps to move anything forward: Know What Needs Moving. What is it, exactly, that you want to move forward? Be as clear about this as you can because, sometimes, 'confusion' is really just a great place to hide-out... which is fine... until you TIRE OF HIDING. Take delight + responsibility in knowing WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL FULLY A

PROHIBITION IS A PRESSURE-COOKER. It creates eventual rebellion in the person or group being forbade an innate human right. Awareness is the only required ingredient to start the simmer. Awareness that life mirrors the in-flight airplane: Flying at higher altitude gives a smoother ride. Unless your pilot (read: federal law) actually prefers low-sky turbulence... benefits from it, somehow.A great example of REBELLIOUS FRUIT is capoeira. Capoeira is a stealth martial art, disguised as dance. It was developed in the 16th century by African slaves that the Portuguese colonized in Brazil. These slaves, like all slaves, were denied the most fundamental human right of self-possession. Colonialism strips the colonized of personal sovereignty + customs that threaten exploitive predators. Capoeira evolved as a way for slaves to sustain hope, cultural memory + fighting instinct.Sativa Yoga is rebellious fruit. It does not promote breaking any law, but it zealously promotes correcting those disa

What's the truest thing you can say?That was the guiding question I used while writing this essay about introversion, inwardness and the inner life. I kept asking myself that question to keep me from falling into RE-search, and focus instead, on SEARCH.It was messy.And liberating.And scary.And worth it.I realize I have come to sound angry at popular culture, for the way it has socialized us to be consumer-bots. I am angry about that, and the truest things I can say are not, necessarily, likable to mainstream society... so that is antagonistic. I mean no harm, or offense. A personal hero, Terence McKenna, said that dominant culture is not our friend. I agree. It averts the truth about things, and then asks (and sometimes forces) us to participate in a variety of collective illusions that aren't even interesting. Let alone good or wise. Each line drawn in the inherited blueprint of our life -- from school onward -- was for the furtherance of our ability to consume.Not discover

ONE-MONTH CHECK-IN It's been one month since our move from Chicago to the far south suburbs, and I am smitten!There are a lot of changes... like the soundscape, for instance. There are so many different bird-songs here. My urban ears were accustomed to picking up, maybe, ONE... and ::poof!:: it'd be quickly gone... but here there are bird CHOIRS! I recorded a sample, and am dropping it in the podcast outro. Listen out for the pretty chimes.There's a big tree in our front yard that's home to a woodpecker -- nature's percussionist. He's replacing the guys outside my bedroom window in the city who played upside down buckets for donations. Every day. Many hours a day. So I am ready for Woody Woodpecker :-)My sense of distance + space is changing. It feels like, "Wooooowww, there's finally room to expand..." And I don't mean expand trinkets + junk. I mean expand visions + missions. Those persistent ideas I've been carrying around -- all crinkled up in a tiny pocket, waiting for enough minutes +

MAKIN' HOME SWEET. I've been in our new place for one week, and am getting used to the difference between urban and suburban life. One of the most noticeable changes I've enjoyed is waking up to the song of birds, instead of trucks and bucket-drums :-) As I get more settled, and as Spring emerges, I'm excited to share more earth-loving tips + inspiration with you. While I finish unpacking, though, this episode is based on an article I wrote that was originally published in the now gone, but not forgotten, Mindful Metropolis magazine: BLACK + GREEN. There's a perception that black people are outside the environmental movement. Black Americans—together with Native Americans—were, in fact, the original environmentalists in North America. Long before there were threats of climate change, we were recycling food, foil and fabrics. Reusing scraps, containers and paper.We grew what we ate, and we made what we wore. Reducing waste was easy, because there was no excess to waste. We pract

KNOW YOUR NUCLEUS. Right after receiving my certification in permaculture 4 months ago, I felt myself synchronize with the cold winter season. I withdrew socially, and was more dormant on the outside, while Life was seeding wonderful things on the inside.Some are starting to bloom... like the increased clarity about my life's motto and business tagline, which is: "Bridging the sacred + the solid." My diverse trainings + passions, finally distilled into a few words I intend to live out through writing and design.I call this distillation -- this understanding your heart's core so well, that you can feel your own completion -- I call that "knowing your nucleus." I have lots of useful tips to share about this in my nearly done essay, "It's Beautiful Inside: An Introvert's Right to BE."  Stay tuned for that! CHANGE OF ADDRESS Chicago is America's 3rd most populous city. After more than 20 years of living all over it (South Shore, Rogers Park, Lakeview, Lincoln Park, Hyde Pa

12TH PERMACULTURE PRINCIPLE: CREATIVELY USE + RESPOND TO CHANGE. Complacency is second only to gravity for effectiveness in holding things down. It may be our survival instinct to be so fixated on feeling anchored and secure. Rooted and safe.As exciting as change can be, it interrupts stability. So we tend to resist and avoid things that knock us off our center... unfamiliar things that make us feel vulnerable, ill-prepared or out of control."The only people who like change, are wet babies!" they say.Life gives -- and sometimes forces -- lots of change into our days. Which requires a response from us... we have something new to figure out... to possibly fail at, or look foolish trying.But this 12th, and final, permaculture principle tells us to accept the inevitability of change, and creatively use it. Don't be such a control-freak. Be agile, like a cat. Be so fully present in every moment, that you exist your way into a needed solution or upgraded circumstance.&nb

There are a lot of spiritual and cultural celebrations happening, and the generic "Happy Holidays!" greeting is, to me, a way to acknowledge that more happens in the winter season than Christmas -- like Hanukkah, Winter Solstice, Kwanzaa and others. So, Happy Holidays everyone!My spiritual roots were planted in Christianity, so this post is a celebration of Christmas from that perspective (which actually includes many blended, but usually unacknowledged, traditions like Saturnalia and Yule, but that's another post.)  A "tradition" is a transmission of customs or beliefs from generation to generation. It is an inherited, established, customary pattern of thought, action and behavior. Christmas is one of the most tradition-rich times of year.Maybe it's because I'm not a big fan of repetition, or because I need to understand whyI am doing something over and over, but I had to ask "WHY?" If Christ is so central to Christmas that the name is inherent in the word, WHY do so many non-related activities exi

SOME SEASONAL POTPOURRI. When you see mistletoe, what comes to your mind? We typically associate it with winter, festivity, and kissing. But did you know that mistletoe is a parasitic plant? It exists by attaching itself to a host tree, and then absorbing water and nutrients from it.I think this is a very timely and appropriate reminder -- during this time of year when people get even more consumptive than usual -- to not behave as parasites... sucking the life out of the planet we indwell, as though the Earth was nothing more than material resources for our decadent, unconscious pleasure.I know... that message isn't sweet like a sugar cookie, but I only share it 'cause I love you, and our shared home. Which brings me to... AN IMPORTANT RESOURCE FOR URBAN REGENERATIVE DESIGNERS. LOVIN' THE BIG METRO CITIES WE'RE IN. In permaculture circles, there's an unfortunate tendency to regard cities as inferior places to be. Congestion, pollution, senseless zoning restrictions, too much concrete and

This post has sounds AND images. Sensory-rich beings click here for both.I've returned from my two-week training in Permaculture and Superadobe withtangible, hands-on skills I had been aching for. I learned things like: How to use the geometric strength of the arch and the circle in your home construction.  How to decrease the cost, and toxicity, of your constructed home by building it with earth architecture. How to get maximum gain (heat + sunlight) from solar passive energy in your home design. How you can make natural paint from powdered milk, and use magnetite as a natural shimmery additive to your earthen plaster. How to assess the building + growing qualities of your sub-soil. How to hold fresh rainwater on your land, and how to re-direct greywater (which is used sink, shower or laundry water) to needful places, like gardens. The components of a linear food forest, and how to install them. And overall, how to lessen your work, and increase your yields in all endeavors.  Usefu

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WE ARE, (FINALLY), COMPLETING LA HUERTA'S 3-PART SERIES. Part 1 with Imogene Ellis is here.  Part 2 with Sara Ellis is here.  And here we have Patricia Bon, who has returned home to Brazil since we recorded this conversation several months ago.Have you ever thought about how many people there are between your mouth, and your meals?  There are growers, harvesters, packagers, shippers, sellers and, finally, the eater.In this episode, the first part of my conversation with Pat gives a global glimpse into a primal and culinary connection to food.  The journey curves to pick up knowledge in agroforestry, and then a paradigm-shifting permaculture design certification.  Pat then brought all of that experience to her Master's level studies in urban planning, and in The Remediation Project that she led at La Huerta Roots and Rays Community Garden.  Our conversation voices the potential, and challenges, of the community planning process.  Pat is

Welcome to Episode 15 of the Empathic Writing Journey Podcast!  I started this podcast nearly 6 months ago as a way of chronicling my intent to:(1) FREE myself;(2) BE myself;(3) deepen + sweeten my love affair with life; and(4) promote empathy and permaculture/regenerative design.Being faithful to each of these intentions has helped bring me healing I didn't even know I needed.  I was surprised to learn how angry and resentful I had become from feeling like I never had enough time or mental space to simply think.It seemed modern life was always rushing me along, and crowding my inner world with unimportant clutter and chatter.  Two things I'm not particularly fond of, by the way.  I'm contemplative.  And mystical.  And empathic.  To flourish, I need plenty of time and space to tend to my solitary arts.  But my life wasn't designed around those aspects of myself.  My need to think deeply.  Move slowly.  Connect meaningfully.  Creat