Simplistic Reviews Podcast

(This version has no audio of the movie. We have another version with movie audio as well)   Troll 2 | 1990 ‧ Horror ‧ 1h 35m
 A vacationing family discovers that the entire town they're visiting is inhabited by goblins, disguised as humans, who plan to eat them.   Consider one of the best worst movies of all time, we decided to celebrate the month of March with a classic. Troll 2 brings a ton of awful along with it but also doesn't forget about the fun and hilarity a classic good bad film should have in it's DNA.  Grab that shamrock milkshake and test your luck with a sequel that really isn't, everyone this is Troll 2.
  

Have 15 minutes? Good, now you have a 15 minute podcast to watch/listen...let's get to it! In episode 1 the gang gives their one word review of WandaVision. Don't have 15 minutes? Okay fine, they like it...alot!

You're are gonna need the luck of the Irish to get through this St. Patrick's Day episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast without laughing your ass off. The boys weigh in on Shamrock shakes, the proper name for sprinkles, Cruella de Vil, JJ Abrams, WandaVision, and Dom DeLuise. We know...it's a weird show. Julie also has another entry in her diary centering around Gina Carano, Matt and Justin try and guess what's in DJ's pockets, and Raiden and Skeletor make an appearance. All that and more on this full pint of fun known as the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

(This version has the audio of the movie. We have another version without as well) Surf Nazis Must Die | 1987 ‧ Action ‧ 1h 23m When the son of a gun-wielding woman is murdered by neo-Nazi surfers in a post-apocalyptic future, his mother hunts them down to extract her bloodthirsty revenge.   Do you know what is worse than Nazis?... Surf Nazis!   A movie commentary years in the making, today the gang crosses out a highly requested movie. Unbeknownst to them it also turned out to be the perfect February movie as we celebrate black history month with badass Eleanor 'Mama' Washington cleaning up the beach from Nazi trash in Surf Nazis Must Die.   Grab that popcorn with that hook of a hand, and let's kill some neo-Nazi surfers in a new contender for our "Commentary Hall of Fame".  

(This version has no audio of the movie. We have another version with movie audio as well) Surf Nazis Must Die | 1987 ‧ Action ‧ 1h 23m When the son of a gun-wielding woman is murdered by neo-Nazi surfers in a post-apocalyptic future, his mother hunts them down to extract her bloodthirsty revenge.   Do you know what is worse than Nazis?... Surf Nazis!   A movie commentary years in the making, today the gang crosses out a highly requested movie. Unbeknownst to them it also turned out to be the perfect February movie as we celebrate black history month with badass Eleanor 'Mama' Washington cleaning up the beach from Nazi trash in Surf Nazis Must Die.   Grab that popcorn with that hook of a hand, and let's kill some neo-Nazi surfers in a new contender for our "Commentary Hall of Fame". 

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast is back with a brand new, double-sized, extra strength show sure to offend someone out there. Just the way we like it. The boys discuss the possible future of Hollywood in the segment Believable or Bullsh%*. They give their thoughts on the new Marvel show WandaVision, causing DJ to call out all Marvel haters including Ethan Hawke in TV Roundup. And they break down some tough choices in the return of the game Kill F%*k Marry. All that and more on this not so romantic February edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

(This version has the audio of the movie. We have another version without as well)   You ready to be racist brother! Ready when you are Spence! Ok Bru lets do this! Thunder! When the Sun comes up in paradise The girls look pretty Ooh they look nice I can smell the cocoa-lotion in the air Cool breeze blowin everywhere Better start running 'Cause there's a hurricane a-comin' Grab your Piña colada and a Jamaican, this is Thunder in Paradise 2! (Somehow worse than the last one...yeppie)  

(This version has no audio of the movie. We have another version with movie audio as well)   You ready to be racist brother! Ready when you are Spence! Ok Bru lets do this! Thunder! When the Sun comes up in paradise The girls look pretty Ooh they look nice I can smell the cocoa-lotion in the air Cool breeze blowin everywhere Better start running 'Cause there's a hurricane a-comin' Grab your Piña colada and a Jamaican, this is Thunder in Paradise 2! (Somehow worse than the last one...yeppie)  

Break your New Year's resolutions early and enter the world of the Simplistic Reviews podcast. This month, the boys celebrate the end of 2020...briefly. They then delve into what dessert they are gonna gorge themselves on to assuage their depression from the prolonged doom of the pandemic. But don't worry...it's all fun and games as they play four of their favorite movie games to entertain you:  1. Take The F%*king Elephant...a game based on guessing the eerily similar films of Liam Neeson. 2. Simplistic Titles...a game based on figuring out which films Valentine describes is real or fake. 3. Simplistic Death...a game based on guessing a film based only on the description on how the bad guy dies in the end. 4. Simplistic Switcheroo...a game in which the gang theorizes which actor could do another actor's career better. All that and so much more on this Auld Acquaintance Episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

To close out the year, we thought it would be fun to look back on all the sketches we've done in 2020. Julie is your guide as we go from a John Rambo-esque rant on the Star Wars Cinematic Universe, to the two part Sesame Street Syndicate sketch, to He-Man and the Transformers messing about, to Doctor Doom dentistry, to Scream Shenanigans, to Home Alone fallout, and all the great sketches in between...with a little behind the scenes stuff thrown in. So sit back, relax, and enjoy one last silly show before the year is out.

We love our horror and holiday movie commentaries each year and this one has been on the list. Now we finally get to cross it off...no killer Santa, no killer Elf's...Killer Gingerbread!  An evil yet adorable Gingerbread man comes to life with the soul of a convicted killer - this real life cookie monster wreaks havoc on the girl who sent the killer to the electric chair. Oh and that Ginger is Gary Busey...yep that Busey. Happy Holidays everyone!

Holiday Hijinks come once a year, and with The Simplistic Reviews here, you should have no fear! After all the good tidings 2020 has given us, its time to head to The First Korean Church of SR as confessional gets sexy in the newest segment; "Simplistic Confessional with Father Polizzi." Blue Collar Comedy and The Kings of Comedy talk, Matt giving people their signs, DJ creaming over the life's work of Aaron Sorkin, and so much more in this festive edition of the highest rated podcast of recently divorced dads who are planning on creating an OnlyFans Page to pay for their child support; The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

A James Bondish spy and his female assistant infiltrate a group of South American Nazis who have kept Hitler alive until they take over the... using the ultimate weapon. We are back watching another terrible action film of the 80s. Today, we celebrate the great Sir Sean Connery by watching a knockoff Bond film that is worse in every way you could possibly think off. (Don't worry we will watch the other shitfest in this series). Trivia: I believe this film is the first film to make the star, the least entertaining person in the film. Maybe it was the actor who just seems not to really want be here. His character seems to just get lost in the story, almost how lost we got watching this damn cluster fuck. Oh and yeah he's "partner" is a baboon. Let's do this!

  Batman, the Joker, Ra's Al Ghul, Walter Vinci from First Time Watchers...seriously, a whole bunch of people show up on this special Election Edition of the Simplistic Reviews podcast. The boys politic about Hollywood news in the return of Can You Dig It. Julie's Diary reveals your favorite announcer's stance on the upcoming election...kinda. And the boys pick the winners to a couple of battles to the death in another round of Simplistic Fisticuffs. So do your constitutional duty and listen to this brand new episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast.

Happy Halloween!   Join us again for 12 hours of 3 very non-productive men sitting around doing nothing but watching 8 films, 6 terrible and 2 good films. Could it get anymore scary?   Re-live our first annual 12HR Spooktacular! Grab the movies below and watch along with us...if you dare.   Our lineup from the Oct. 17th.   Schedule (EST) 12:00pm - The Funhouse (1981) 1:35pm - Evil Dead (2013) 3:06pm - Break #1 3:11pm - Hellbound (1994) 4:45pm - Monster Dog (1984) 6:10pm - Intermission - Break #2 6:17pm - Soultaker (1990) 7:52pm - Final Destination 5 (2011) 9:14pm - Break #3 9:19pm - Pumpkinhead (1988) 10:45pm - Dracula (1931) 12:00am - End

Death Spa R 1989 ‧ Horror/Slasher ‧ 1h 28m Customers at an exclusive fat farm are haunted by a force which turns exercise equipment into deadly killing machines. Spooky! Halloween is right around the corner, so lets watch a movie about exercise equipment killing people! Sounds like one hell of a movie right? We all know COVID-19 came with a lot. Now we need to loss a bit of weight, so come with us as we all signup to loss a few pints of blood. Oh and don't worry about the random murders. Each one banks us a free 3 week gym membership. Grab your LA Looks, that neon shirt and lets hit the gym...or spa...ugh...whatever this is Death Spa!

Matt and Justin sit down here on Simplistic Takes and discuss season 2 (up to episode 7) of the best show on right now, The Boys!    

On this Simplistic Sit-Down, Matt chats with the fantastic Debbie Rochon, a women of so many talents it would be a travesty to mention this all in this summary.   Maybe you should just listen to the show and see what we mean.   For more info on Debbie, please visit Debbie's homepage, right HERE

On this October episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast, Justin talks about his brush with brush fires near his California home. The boys discuss frightening possibilities in a segment we call Scary Thoughts. Matt compares Justin to Robert Kraft inexplicably, and DJ dresses up in order to see if Matt and Justin can guess what he's supposed to be in a game called What Are You Supposed To Be. All that and more on this spooktacular episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast. Yes...we know spooktacular isn't a word.

We're back with another Simplistic Interview. This time we have John Brennan, a man of many talents. From his kindergarten song writing career, days of working with Troma, and his magnum opus, the opening theme for "The Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs" on Shudder, we cover it all. John was also one of the producers on Troma's latest take from the Bard; #ShakespearesShitstorm, which we also review HERE. Matt and John also chat about how great Jim Henson truly was, might get a little political, and we let the crowd know that Troma is always looking for the next great script. It could be YOU!!! Follow John on Twitter HERE And find out more about #ShakespearesShitstorm HERE