Mantalks Podcast: Purpose | Legacy | Relationships | Self Mastery | Business

I was asked recently what I'd say to men who've been thinking about giving up. Who are at the end of their rope. Not an easy topic, and I don't have a magic bullet or tactical steps for you this time.But I do have a gentle reminder.(00:00:00) - Intro, and choice(00:07:42) - On suffering and gauging what you can truly change(00:15:31) - The risk of convincing***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck out some other free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your RelationshipBuild brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. Enjoy the podcast? Leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Po

Talking points: parents, anger, unavailabilityMy guest this week came to work on how can't see any path other than "it's all on me", as well as a feeling of emotional distance from his father. But why? What's hidden in the shadow that connects the two? This is an excellent episode to get a feel for the work in action—and how we so easily bury certain parts of ourselves and others in the unconscious. (00:00:00) - Intro, what my guest is struggling with, and his family situation(00:10:30) - How my guest’s teenage self felt in the moment(00:19:16) - What’s really going on(00:27:01) - What my guest has realized***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck out some other free resou

Talking points: mindset, nervous systemThere's good, there's great, and then there's real mastery. I've had the privilege of working and talking with many extraordinary men. Masters of their craft. There's something that all of them do well—and it's what separates the great from the exceptional. Listen in.(00:00:00) - Intro(00:05:51) - What separates good from great, and great from exceptional(00:10:35) - The best part, and the crucial part(00:14:25) - The importance of slowness***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck out some other free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your RelationshipBuild brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded m

Talking points: traumaThis week, I sit down with Tim Fletcher to explore the deep and often misunderstood world of complex trauma. We unpack how subtle childhood experiences like emotional neglect or identity suppression can shape our nervous systems, relationships, and sense of self for decades. Tim breaks down the science and psychology behind trauma and its complexity, and offers insights into how healing actually happens. If you've ever struggled with anxiety, emotional reactivity, or feeling disconnected, this one is for you.(00:00:00) – Introduction to Tim Fletcher and What Is Complex Trauma?(00:06:20) – Subtle Forms of Childhood Trauma(00:12:00) – Simple vs. Complex Trauma(00:19:20) – Adult Symptoms of Complex Trauma(00:28:10) – How Trauma Shapes the Brain(00:37:50) – Recovery and Co-regulation(00:54:00) – Presence, Addiction, and ConnectionTim Fletcher started helping people as a pastor over 30 years ago. When he experienced some significant personal trauma, he transitioned into the addiction treatmen

Talking points: anxiety, attention, mindsetWhat if the jitters aren't just from the extra coffee this morning? What if you're taking in too much info, courtesy of the never-ending scroll? There's something underneath it all, team, and building resiliency against that can be an absolute game changer. Here's how.(00:00:00) - What’s underneath all anxiety, and what it does(00:03:01) - Why this is relevant to men(00:06:38) - The Cheesecake Factory Effect(00:09:15) - So what do you do, and what real freedom involves(00:15:33) - Do it scared, and do it to completion (with a caveat)(00:19:43) - Find the joy in the process, NOT the outcome***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck o

Talking points: relationship, attachment, cultureI love Stan because he's able to cut through so much of the modern BS around relationships, and get straight to practical, tactical perspectives and advice. We covered a TON of ground here, from the importance of social contracts and mutual protection, to the need for shared vision and purpose in creating equitable and collaborative relationships. This is definitely a convo that will spark some discussion, so listen in, team.(00:00:00) - Intro and the nature of secure functioning(00:05:52) - Human Nature and Relationship Dynamics(00:10:01) - Impact of Technology on Relationships(00:23:35) - Creating Secure Functioning Relationships(00:35:06) - Predictability and Prevention in Relationships(00:36:51) - The Importance of Quick Repair(00:43:02) - Mutual Protection and Solidarity(00:47:20) - Compatibility and Relationship Agreements(00:51:59) - The Role of Attachment in Relationships(01:00:42) - Final Thoughts and P

Talking points: relationships, infidelityNot the happiest of talking points today, team, but it's always worth discussing. There's no universal reason for it, but from my own experience and years of working with men, I've seen some common themes. Here's a quick breakdown of the top reasons, plus the underlying motivation for almost every man that's knocked on my door.(00:00:00) - Intro, and the underlying motivation for a majority of men(00:03:40) - Reasons that fall into this category(00:10:53) - One of the main drivers for my own infidelity, and how attachment styles can play into it***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck out some other free resources: How To Quit Porn

Talking points: mental health, masculinity, cultureWhen Movember reaches out, you answer the call. I'm grateful to have interviewed Professor John Oliffe on a recent report co-authored by him—and spearheaded by the Movember Institute for Men's Health. Some of the stats they've released left me a little surprised; like 2 in 5 men in Canada die prematurely, and from largely preventable casues. Listen to this one, team.(00:00:00) - Intro, and the premature mortality of men(00:10:29) - On co-constructed masculinity, and how modern complexity affects how we perceive manhood(00:16:26) - On “protest masculinity”, and what’s causing men to die early?(00:22:34) - Depression, suicide, and getting upstream of the risk factors(00:32:120) - Why hiding what you’re going through so common, and why some men dismiss the healthcare system(00:40:06) - What Dr. Oliffe would say to the man reluctant to see a therapist(00:44:49) - The changes and diversity of modern masculinityDr. John Oliffe is a Professor and Tier 1 Canada Resea

Talking points: relationships, cultureThis might bother some of you, but I think it needs discussing, because I get it all the time in comments, emails, and DMs: serious disappointment and frustration with dating. From men and women both. There are a lot of reasons for this, both surface-level and deeper, but here's what I'm seeing the most. (00:00:00) - Intro(00:05:04) - What we’re not actually teaching young men(00:08:14) - Where do we go from here?(00:11:04) - A gap I see in most relationships(00:13:37) - Have the conversation***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck out some other free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your RelationshipBuil

Talking points: relationships, the shadow, psychologyEvery man casts a shadow, regardless of how much of "the work" he's done. But whether or not you let it negatively impact your relationships is up to you. Listen in for what shadow work actually means for your relationships, and straightforward advice on how to get started.(00:00:00) - Intro and the biggest misconception about shadow work(00:03:57) - How the shadow can manifest in a relationship(00:08:40) - But WHY does this happen?(00:12:12) - Tips for shadow awareness in your relationship(00:18:19) - Last but not least: accountability, and what integration means

Talking points: myth, psychology, purposeI've loved myths and legends since I was a kid. As a man, that love has only grown because they can serve up powerful, meaningful guidance. So this week, we're digging into what Arthur, Excalibur, and the Holy Grail teach about the journey of the mature masculine.(00:00:00) - Intro(00:02:38) - Boyhood, coming of age, and crossing the thresholds of manhood(00:07:45) - The symbol and importance of Excalibur(00:16:04) - The sword in the stone CAN’T be pulled by might(00:18:33) - The meaning of pursuing the “holy grail”(00:22:36) - Purpose and ego don’t usually mix

Talking points: inner child, fatherhood, abandonment, the shadowFair warning, there's a lot of F-bombs in this one. We've kept them in because I want people to get a sense of how deep a father wound can go. My guest has struggled with a kind of dualistic life. One day, he's crushing it and confident. The next, he feels uncertain and lost. This is a heavy one, team, but absolutely worth checking out. ***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck out some other free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your RelationshipBuild brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. Enjoy the podcast? Leave

Talking points: fatherhood, psychology, mindsetA while back, I put up an episode on the mother wound, aka healing your mommy issues. But there's always more to the story. There's also the "father wound", and it can have massive impact on everything from self-worth to relationships to skill at work. Listen in for a serious look at what it is, what creates it, and what to work on.(00:00:00) - Intro and defining the “father wound”(00:04:47) - The kinds of fathers/childhoods that create this(00:13:53) - Symptoms of father wounding, and why they’re important to know(00:23:52) - Common “archetypes” of fathers that create a father wound(00:26:40) - So what do you do? (00:32:09) - On fathering yourself***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t

Talking points: genetics, culture, psychology, parentingI'm the kid who's always running to see what's over the next hill, so I'm both grateful and excited to have Alex on the show. His latest book is incredible, and gets to the science of how we're actually happier with a little less predictability in so many parts of our lives. If you're someone whose life feels kind of listless right now, this is YOUR episode.(00:00:00) - The “explorer gene”, dopamine, and the impact of modern tech on our ability to explore(00:15:20) - Our relationship with the unknown, and how it messes us up sometimes(00:25:04) - How the unknown can challenge relationships, and how to navigate that(00:29:40) - The difference between exploration and exploitation(00:35:54) - The “free energy principle” and the “effort paradox”(00:52:52) - Tactical insights on amping up your exploration mindsetAlex Hutchinson is the New York Times bestselling author of Endure, a longtime columnist for Outside covering the science of endurance, and a Nationa

Talking points: culture, psychology, masculinityI've covered the data behind this multiple times. A lot of men—not just in North America but globally—are struggling. Today I want to spark some dialogue by bringing some attention to what I think are just a few of the underlying reasons.And I want your thoughts, too. Comment if you're on Spotify, DM me on Instagram. This is worth talking about beyond the usual blame games or "it's always been like this" deflection.***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck out some other free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your RelationshipBuild brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around t

Talking points: sex, relationships, cultureEditor's Note: FYI team, had some audio snafus that we did our best to remedy. Thanks for your understanding! Grateful that Jamie and I sat down to talk all things intimate relationships. From how culture keeps shaping what men and women respond to, desire, and miss out on, to helping both yourself and her feel not just comfortable but welcome. This is a great ep to listen to with a partner, my friends. (00:00:00) - What most men need to know about women’s desire(00:05:41) - Helping a woman feel like all of her is welcome(00:13:58) - Helping a partner who isn’t fully comfortable with themselves(00:30:18) - For couples that find themselves stuck in monotony or dead bedroom(00:37:58) - Common challenges women face in the “tragic phase”, and how men can move to support them(00:44:04) - Become a gardener, not a consumerJamie Elizabeth Thompson has developed a holistic body of work to support women, men, and couples with letting go of limiting patterns around sex so they

Talking points: attachment, relationships, psychologyIf you're the more anxious type and you're dating someone more avoidant (or vice versa), it can create a whole realm of intensity that many people find hard to fathom. It's the best and worst of the old saying "opposites attract". Here's how to lower the temperature and move towards something more secure. (00:00:00) - Intro and what contributes to this dynamic(00:05:36) - The signs and signals that you’re in the cycle(00:07:20) - How you break it, step one: figure out how you’re contributing(00:10:13) - Two: full transparency of where you’re at(00:12:46) - Three: learn how to lean into yourself OR the relationship(00:16:24) - The phrase every avoidant needs to know***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about att

Talking points: masculinity, mental health, friendshipShort but important one, team. I'm sure you've seen the memes that go something like "Is the cure for male loneliness pickleball?" Maybe you've rolled your eyes at them more than once. I have. Nevertheless, the data is clear, and a lot of men out there are starved of quality friend time. Here's how to change that.(00:00:00) - Intro and why friendships are so important(00:02:11) - The challenges, and tips to overcome them(00:05:05) - The value of reciprocity and shared interests(00:10:00) - Conflict is a part of it***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck out some other free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation

Talking points: relationshipsYes, that's a provocative title. Yes, listen to the whole thing. No, this isn't men being mad at women. This is what I've seen time and again, plus what I've been told by multiple women and couples I've worked with, and it's something both parties are responsible for.(00:00:00) - The factor good men are missing(00:04:24) - Defining “emotional containment”(00:08:30) - The big caveat, and an exampleSo like I said, listen to the whole thing. ***Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worthPick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck out some other free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your RelationshipBuild brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from aro

Talking points: psychology, attachment theoryWe've had a LOT of newcomers recently, and I'm getting some great questions around what attachment theory means for men specifically. To that end, I've made you all a compilation; an episode chock-full of info on the two most common styles! One that cuts through the jargon and gives you some things you can work on literally right now. (00:00:00) - The core of anxious attachment(00:06:33) - What causes anxious attachment, and how it shows up in a relationship(00:16:59) - What to do with anxiety, starting with the breath(00:22:02) - Reclaiming your ability to ground yourself, and exposure therapy (00:27:13) - The first, most important things to know re: avoidant attachment (00:31:46) - How avoidant attachment shows up, and where it can come from in childhood(00:43:54) - How it can show up in a relationship(00:47:25) - Healing avoidant attachment: six simple tacticsFor EVEN MORE info, dig into the Ultimate Guide To Attachment HERE: https://training.mantalks.