Bros Watch Pll Too - A Pretty Little Liars Podcast

We’re almost done. Two to go for this trash show. The writers pretended the plot was over at the end of the last episode, so we’re treated to a lame recap where they try to lampshade their poor storytelling. A bunch of stuff happens off screen, and we’re told, not shown, a bunch of random stuff to move the plot along. The evil Sheriff is revealed to be more evil, and the secret rapist becomes rather obvious. People got paid to write this…

The Sinners concoct a dumb, pointless plan to gather up a bunch of bloody cotton balls from the school Blood Drive, so they can test them en masse to see if one of the students is the father of Imogen’s rape baby. Oh, and Crazy Joe comes back, acts super threatening, seems to clearly be A and then k-words himself, so of course he’s not A. Help.

Imogen encourages Tabby to go to the cops about her assault, but isn’t ready to go yet herself. Instead, she’s doing the old, “high school project to take care of a fake baby with a romantic interest” plot line, which is extra gross because… you know. Mouse has more drama with her creepy LARPing dude Steve, and tricks her mom into revealing one of the more boring deep dark secrets imaginable. Faran is suddenly dealing with chronic pain and tells her mom off and is even more empowered and makes out with her dancer boyfriend. Whatever. Noa gets a physical trainer that might be encouraging her to juice. Tabby cooks up a new scheme to catch her rapist, rather than talking with a counselor about it.

Imogen and Tabby bond over their shared trauma and take a trip to fake-ass Rosewood to talk to fake-ass Eddie Lamb at the fake-ass Radley Hotel. Noa, Faran, and Mouse are stuck in some theater kid after school special nonsense. But don’t worry, folks, everything is super empowering and totally on fleek. Straight bussin’ fr fr no cap.

The Sinners throw a High School Rager™ to raise money to save the local rec center—er, pay Imogen’s mortgage. Everyone talks to each other like they’re in a flame war on Tumblr. It’s Halloween. There’s lots of costumes, but no Adam Lambert or even Giant Drag making an appearance. I hate this show. Help!

This week on the pod, Imogen’s been thinking about her mom, and she’s got some unkind words for the rotting bitch. Mouse has like five lines. Faran might be the worst. Noa gets chased around and scared into selling her useless mom out. And Tabby has a super-fun sexual assault mystery plot line! We’d rather be watching the show where Caleb and Toby are driving through town on the way to infiltrate some Actual Bad Guys.

Karen is dead! Or was it secretly Kelly? Who cares? It’s not like we’d seen enough of them for it to mean anything. The “Liars” are lying about the one thing it would make sense to tell the truth about, and telling the truth about everything else. The writers don’t seem interested in developing characters or creating tension, and the direction is somehow even worse. WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THE CAMERA???

Something finally happens on the show this week, despite the whole, “We’re gonna kill Karen Beasley!” thing being a complete lie. Imogen has feeling about being Sprit Queen like her mom when she also bullied a girl like her mom (but she doesn’t know that yet). Mouse is very upset about the killing of some dirty rodent. Faran doesn’t have much to do. Tabby makes way too many horror movie references. And Noa blackmails the Sheriff so she can go to the dance. Oh, and “Karen” is “killed” by “A.”

After a long slumber, the Bros have awoken and attended the red carpet premiere of Pretty Little Liars: Original Sin, a show featuring no Pretty Little Liars, no originality, and not enough sin. We only watched this once, and this is all from memory, so if we get something wrong, blame Warner Bros for not inviting us to the after party. Also, we’re doing a giveaway. Listen for details and a chance to win Pretty Little Liars: The Complete series, on Digital.

This week on the pod, we’re doing our commentary track for Pretty Little Liars s01e22 “For Whom the Bell Tolls.” The Liars finally take things into their own hands by trying to blackmail Ian with a burner phone. Aria is upset with Ezra’s lies of omission about Jackie Molina. Garrett tries to use his friendship with Emily’s family to get her to spill Liar secrets. Hanna is despondent about her Caleb breakup. And Spencer gets in a car crash and fights with Ian in the church belfry.

This week on the pod, we’re doing our commentary track for Pretty Little Liars s01e21 “Monsters in the End.” It’s Founder’s Day or something in Rosewood, which means creepy clowns on stilts and haunted houses for Spencer to be terrorized in. Elsewhere, Aria terrorizes us all with her paper bag selfies and complaints about Ezra’s Website Page. Caleb tries to talk to a heartbroken Hanna, but Mona is gatekeeping him away. And Emily finds a new love interest when Paige bails on her.

This week on the pod, we’re doing our commentary track for Pretty Little Liars s01e20 “Someone to Watch Over Me.” Spencer doesn’t feel safe around Ian and her parents sure don’t care. Hanna discover’s Caleb’s betrayal and slaps the smile off Jenna Thing’s face. Aria’s parents are fighting again when they discover she’s got a boy in her life. And Emily is flummoxed when Paige goes on a date with Sean.

This week on the pod, we’re doing our commentary track for Pretty Little Liars s01e19 “A Person of Interest.” Caleb gives Hanna what Sean refused to. Aria cosplays as Ezra’s undersexed wife, but he’s more focused on the Jenna Thing’s semi-autobiographical essay. Paige gets Emily to sing karaoke, and Spencer is the big spoon with Toby on a stakeout.

This week on the pod, we’re doing our commentary track for Pretty Little Liars s01e18 “The Badass Seed.” Aria is a terrible stage manager and everyone in the whole school can tell there’s something going on between her and Ezra. Hanna gets a peak at Caleb in the shower, and it’s weird with him afterward. Emily gets to have scenes with Toby one more time before he’s Spencer’s forever, and speaking of Spence, she’s discovers a new clue and for the first and last time, trusts the police with it.

This week on the pod, we’re doing our commentary track for Pretty Little Liars s01e17 “The New Normal.” Hanna is letting the Artful Dodger sleep in her basement, and he comes in handy when he clocks James Leland as a lying goldbricker trying to con her mom vis a vis dead old Mrs. Potter’s safety deposit box. Aria is perturbed when her Dad thinks there’s something going on between Ezra and Ella. Emily has to deal with Paige’s homophobic dad, and then Paige showing her tongue down her throat. And Spencer goes snooping around creepy Jenna Thing’s house looking for clues.

This week on the pod, we’re doing our commentary track for Pretty Little Liars s01e16 “Je Suis une Amie.” Spencer is newly interested in Sad Boi Toby Cavanaugh. Aria is freaking out because it seems like her mom was at the same museum where she went on a date with Ezra, and is clearly lying about it. Hanna bonds with Rosewood Bad Boy and all around total babe Caleb Rivers by pointing out which of her classmates he can exploit, and how. And Emily is living in the greatest Melissa Etheridge video of all time with Paige.

This week on the pod, we’re doing our commentary track for Pretty Little Liars s01e15 “If At First You Don’t Succeed, Lie, Lie Again.” Hanna betrays Aria so that A will put out a hit on Mrs. Potter. Emily has a meet-cute moment with Paige where Paige tries to drown her. Ezra goes on a fancy adult date with his child girlfriend Aria. And an old, haunting photo of Ali from That Night reminds Spencer that she kinda did want to murder her friend.

Pull our strings and we’ll wink at you, we’re your puppets! Special guest Sarah won the Trouble contest, and picked Benji’s favorite episode of Pretty Little Liars to talk about. It’s s03e23 “I’m Your Puppet.” Please enjoy this commentary track where we discuss how to fence a hot bell, The Dark Spencer Saga, Pam suddenly working for the cops, Aria’s encounter with Red Coat in the morgue, and so much more.

Special guest this week! It’s Demi, winner of our recent Trouble contest, to talk about Pretty Little Liars s05e09 “March of Crimes.” So. Much. Twinning! Aria is being a terrible friend to Hanna about Baker Bro Zach’s lecherous behavior. Spencer confronts Caleb about all the Haleb drinking. Emily is in Girl Detective mode, stealing locker combos and breaking into cars. And Noel Kahn is hiding under a blanket. What a fun ep!

This week on the pod, we’re doing our commentary track for Pretty Little Liars s01e14 “Careful What U Wish 4.” Aria’s old babysitter Simone aka Meg Manning is making eyes at Ezra Fitz, and Aria will NOT stand for it. Spencer thinks Ian has stolen her laptop to erase the incriminating video of him and Ali in the woods, Emily is getting drunk and dropping hard truth bombs after Maya gets distant at True North, and Hanna is forced to dance with Lucas at the Dance-a-thon all night, finally ending her relationship with Sean. But don’t worry, Hanna Banana, a certain cell phone hacker makes his first appearance in this ep. It’s Caleb!!!